”“If Mama and Papa help us, could we build a house big enough for them to live with us? Maybe we can even stake a claim on the land and stay here ...o raise our family.”“Let’s do it, Willah. I’ve helped saw and chop logs for men to build houses. With you, your Mama and Papa working too, we could build us a house plenty big enough for all of us, and our kids. I want lots of kids, don’t you?”“YES! I hope we can have two boys and two girls. We could raise them here, teach them to read and write, to. I lost weight rapidly, my cheeks became gaunt and my hair and skin looked lifeless. I went for my nightly walks, taking the dog with me. I sat on the bank’s edge by the creek and bawled my eyes out. My family needed me, but I couldn’t give them anything of myself. I had nothing to give. Why me? Why the hell me? Why let me fall in love so deeply, only to take it away from me? I couldn’t come to terms with the loss at all. At any point in any day, I would burst into tears. The loss of control I. In the maze I was somehow only loosely connected with passionate Martha and enigmatic Ronnie; I didn't know what the rules were, or why we were there, or why they stayed with me, or what they wanted. The whole day, the whole city, the whole world had seemed bizarre from the moment I opened my eyes that morning.We decided to walk home from Penn Station, the three of us joined as Martha grabbed my hand and pulled me between her and Ronnie, and then Ronnie took my hand as well. All three of us. The water was somewhat close to boiling, which was close enough. He grabbed a mug, poured in a packet of hot chocolate, then added water and handed it to her. She clutched at it, her body shaking, and took a short sip. Then a longer one. Her eyes closed, and her whole body began to relax. Nothing like some Swiss Miss to calm you down and remind you of happier times. Fred poured his own cup, took a drink, then knelt down beside her. He put a hand on her towel covered knee, and she opened her.
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