Democrat-ism 2: How can we send a man to the moon and still have all this shit?Democracy-ism: Everyone has the same opportunity to make shit happen.De...ialism: What shit?Depressionism: Why can’t shit happen to me too!Descartes: I shit, therefore I am.Despotism: Let only one shit happen.Determinism: Obviously, that shit was bound to happen to you.Dianetics: (see Scientology below)Discordianism 1: Some funny shit happened to me today.Discordianism 2: This might be shit, or it might be a fuzzy pink. There was my brother lying on his side on his bed (in the same pose Tammi was in for her picture). From the look of it, he must have had the camera on his desk and used the timer I guess. Then I noticed it. It wasn't like totally hard, but it sure didn't look small and soft like I thought it was supposed to. It was big and thick. I found myself studying it when all of a sudden Jim spoke up again.Jim: "you still there? you're quiet again"Jill: "ahhhh .... yeah ... sorry ... i didn't say i wanted. I knew she would never do that."I know, sweetheart, I know you wouldn't. I know you better than that." I had to get her off that subject, fast."What did Protocol 14 do?" I asked, trying to take her mind off what we were talking about. I thought I saw where this was going now."It called in the power of everyone like us everywhere. I was unconscious at the time but they tell me dozens of colors of lightning came from the ceiling. All of them combined through the leader to provide the energy to. “Oh really.”“I mean, you have negative fish right now,” she explained. “You owe the sea a fish!”I laughed. “Hey, it was just day one of the competition. I suffered a horrible penalty at the hands of the, um, impartial judges,” I sang dramatically.“No one said life was fair. Tell you what, just because I’m so sweet, I’ll give you a pity point because of Julie.”“Pity point? Whatever. I don’t need it. I’m going to beat you fair and square!”And with that, a fish grabbed onto my line. Excitement.
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