‘You’re not fat you’re just…voluptuous,’ her mother always used to tell her after one depressing shopping trip or another where Rainey had i...evitably spent long minutes in the dressing room, ashamed of the way her breasts seemed to overflow tank tops and her thighs—oh God, her thighs—rubbed together beneath skirts she never had the courage to buy. ‘Right, mom,’ Rainey would reply. ‘So voluptuous that I’ve never even been on a date.’ The standard, ‘Boys aren’t everything,’ always came after. In high school, she had blossomed into the beautiful category. Boys chased her. She was attracted to the "bad boy" type, with fast cars and lost her virginity in the back seat with one. As a “fast girl”, I was stimulated by her escapades and quizzed her about sex details to prepare for my marriage. Her veer to the wild side, however, skewed her life's universe to an unhappy ending.My fiancé took control of not just my life when with him but all of it. His directives were, finish high school,. It might have beenchildish to get enjoyment to see him sulk away, but they did not care.Before they went to start their day Ziggy said he was happy he wasescorting Jordan to the prom and they were going to have a great time.Jordan agreed.************That little conversation between Ziggy, Steff and Jordan was too juicyfor their fellow classmates around them to ignore what was said even ifthey wanted to. How succulent that little conversation was made it tootantalizing not to share. They might. The next day as we all disembarked in Stockholm, I watched him leave with his fat wife in tow, wondering if he had my soiled panties in his pocket.Like d**gs sex was becoming an essential fix for me, each act requiring something more dangerous and outrageous, young bucks were being replaced with old men, as making them hard made it more fun, and by my late teens, I was a scarlet woman of daily sexual activity, touching men on buses and trains, not wearing underwear, flashing and playing voyeur,.
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