Either I am a full member of this marriage or I'm going my own way when we get to Oregon. I may go to California, since I know where some of the bigge... gold strikes occurred. I hate the idea of leaving Claire and Elizabeth, but I can't stay if this keeps going on.God, but it's hard to get to sleep alone in my bed. I have been awake for at least half the night. I am writing this at the main fire after I gave up getting to sleep. I have to get some sleep though, because we are taking our wagon. The man she had slept with was married and his wife was meant to be coming. My mind was a blur. I started to feel insecure, nervous. I struggled to find topics of conversation. All I wanted to do was tell her how I felt about her. All that ran through my mind was that this was going to be a long weekend. After setting up our tents we set up for the night at the living history area, where the few members of the regiment were, we started to drink. Silence. Awkwardly comfortable silence permeated. That is the thing about the familiar, we are loath to leave it. Thereis something comforting in what we know, even if what we know is miseryand loneliness. It's what keeps battered women from leaving theirhusbands, and unhappy employees from finding a new job. In that, asimple human frailty pushed Ted back into the arms of Ann, a woman thathe felt he actually deserved. While he felt his heart breaking, hesteadied himself with the knowledge that Elise would find a better man,and lead a. After all, I was so drunk it was hard to tell the difference. I nodded stupidly and the two of them grabbed me by each arm and took me inside.The game started off innocently enough. We went around the circle and told various truths. When we started to get brave, the “dares” started to come out. They were small at first. Amanda made me kiss Kelsie (with tongue) for 5 seconds and Kelsie made me do the same to Amanda. When Kelsie finally said “dare,” I made her kiss Amanda. Kelsie closed her eyes.
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