Waiting? Why? Would it happen soon?That made me look over my shoulder, and shy from brush thickets ortrees, or anywhere someone might hide. I'd led...men into places where death rained and never hesitated aninstant. Yet, in this meek body and under my curse, I was scared of myshadow. Worse, I had the creepy feeling the garden hated me, or at least wasangry at my trespassing in Lilly's realm. From nowhere, tree limbssprung to scratch me, and vines always tangled my feet. During this wretched. ..I stumble. No, I "stumble"I fall forward onto the table and I swipe my arm out as if trying to catch my fall sending cards and money flying. I sweep my arms several times to make sure I get most of it."Clumsy me and I didn't even have any drinks. Oops!"I get up and exit to the bedroom. What they do now is not my problem.A half hour later Jacob comes in and undresses."Poker game over?" Yes because of you. Tony was winning. He's pissed." What for? He won then." We don't know how much each of us. The more she analysed her life the more the emptiness at its core grewlike a quiet cancer. Having finished her last chore for the day she collectedher coat and purse and left, saying goodbye to Miss Henry when she was halfwayout of the door and it was too late to be asked to do another task. She passed the motels that fought for attention with their giant lollipopstyle signs on the main drag out of town but they simply merged into the anonymityof visual noise between the car lots and fast food. Is that fair? If we want them to assume the mantle of productive adults, shouldn't we treat them with common courtesy, at a minimum?" They're going to laugh at you," said Cecelia. "And they won't respect you." I called you Miss Carter when you were in my class." You did? I don't remember that." Sometimes," said Bob. He felt a stab of regret as he remembered what else he'd called her, not knowing then what it meant. He tried to gloss over that. "Sometimes, I called you what your friends called.
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