The paint was chipping off the stacked cement blocks that make up the walls. She didn’t know how long she lay there crying but eventually Marie cou...dn’t take it. She held the small pillow tight in her arms wishing it were Jack and faded off into a fitful sleep.Jack lay staring at the ceiling of his hotel room, he couldn’t sleep, his stomach was on fire. He’d already downed a half bottle of antacid but hadn’t helped. He couldn’t stop thinking about Marie, he wanted her so bad sexually, but. . Is that all? This one time and everything is over? how will my life change after that? How can I "adapt" to that? How will I face her? What path will my sexlife take after that...? And most importantly how will I live without this... Without him... I want him I know it now... I need to have him... I will surrender to his will... I want to live in this ecstasy... And I have a feeling that he wants it too... I hope he does... As my feelings grow in to a mountain I feel my defenses and taboos. ”Julia stood up and faced the fire. Prisha also stood and moved away from me.Sarah said, “It’s exciting, huh? Who would have guessed our quiet mountain man is actually one dangerous dude?”Julia turned to face us, arms across her chest. “Exciting? It’s awful. Disgusting. What happened is awful, and what he did.”“Hey,” said Sarah, “the guy completely deserved it.”“No,” I said. “He deserved justice, not what I did to him. I should have been stronger. Let the courts deal with him. But losing her. She finally accepted it.That spring, we went to the John Deere dealer in Watonga and made a deal on some used farm machinery and I spent the weekends plowin' Beth's fields, puttin' in corn and beans. After I graduated, farmin' was my full time job.Beth didn't pout about it or nothin'. Once she figured I wasn't gonna budge, she pitched in and made sure I done the job right. She learned about farmin' and marketing crops n' all that stuff.That first year was a good one n' we actually made a.
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